There’s this one awesome (super popular) guy in my dorm hall that everyone admires. I’m always in awe of how he is able to make such a strong positive impression on everyone, so I thought I’d write a list of all the things that make him so like-able. Due to time and length restrictions, these are the top ten qualities to become like-able. Hope all you guys enjoy!
1. Show genuine interest.
Anyone generally interested and excited by what I have to say will be 100X more favorable in my mind than someone who shows a lack of interest. This guy is a great listener, and he shows his interest in the conversation by giving positive feedback, he sparks the conversation by adding to it with his own experiences, thoughts, and ideas, and then he instigates them to continue talking through more positive reinforcement. You start out smiling and nodding. You assertively add a comment, and then, you continue to engage the person in the conversation. It’s a great sandwiching method that many successful leaders and entrepreneurs use, and can also be used to provide constructive criticism or feedback to someone when you sandwich the negative comment in between the two positively reinforcing comments.
2. It’s okay to have terrifyingly embarrassing photos posted up on Facebook for the world to see.
No, it really isn’t. But the key is to keep the photos up. Never take the photos down because that is a sign of weakness. Unconsciously, he shows the world he is not ashamed of the photo. Real men are still embarrassed, but they simply do not show it.He doesn’t care if you see him in less-than-decent poses because he is confident you will still love him unconditionally after viewing such. In fact, it’s photos like these that make a person interesting and desirable as a companion. Everyone wants a friend who is not afraid to laugh at himself/herself.
3. Make the most of your talents.
This dude plays the piano well. I mean.. really well. There are a lot of great pianists around in college, but he knows how to woo girls through his piano songs. Yes, wooing is more than just playing a long, beautiful romantic song on the piano… although that is 90% of the wooing. 🙂 It means taking the time to know the interests of the person he is playing the song for. He always asks for requests, and this creates affinity since he is taking into account your suggestion and interests into his creation, so in some ways, it’s also our creation. It’s brilliant, and a great way to make yourself like-able.
4. Smart Guys 🙂
Girls have a general consensus that they look for some signs of intelligent life on guys. This guy is very, very smart. It’s just another brilliant way to get people to respect and admire you when you are a genius. Ashton Kutcher told it best. Smart is the new sexy.
5. Make people feel comfortable around you.
My hall mate is very amiable and agreeable. Girls feel comfortable sharing secrets with him, sharing a bed (and blanket), and other stuff too! What’s his secret? Perhaps lots of experience with lots of girls.. but really it’s because he is comfortable with the situation. He makes others comfortable because of his confidence and his own comfort level. You set the mood for others, and this is why “Being Yourself” is so important in gaining rapport with others.
6. Sharing things.
Yes, sharing good free food is the best, fastest way to get college kids to like you. It’s a proven fact. He shares food, secrets, and beds.
7. Kind, Generous, and Humble
He is extremely kind and generous, and this is usually reciprocated by appreciation and kindness. My favorite part is that he often plays off his kindness and generosity and makes it seem as though it’s just his OCD to fold blankets… hmm.. or maybe he really has OCD, but I’d like to think he’s just really kind hearted. He always makes time to help people out if they ask a question or need help.
8. Persistency works!
I promise repetition shows interest. If you make the effort to get to know someone whether it be to tag along with them all day (and gasp, go shopping) just to get them to acknowledge your presence or to get them involved in some fun creative way (like bake cookies), you are sure to be liked to some degree. There’s a psychology term for this… Reciprocation of liking. Ah yes, that’s it.
9. Create a network. Connect people.
This is a great way to increase likability! You introduce two different people to one another and you get closer to both of them! My hall mate was able to connect the guys in our hall with the girls on the floor above. By increasing the availability of the two halls to meet and intermingle, he has not at all decreased his chances due to increased competition. Rather, he has increased his likability in both halls. How? The guys in our hall now have a chance with the girls upstair. The girls think he’s not available or simply not interested, and therefore by nature are more attracted/curious to know more about him.
10. Get ladies = Automatic Male Respect.
The key is simple. I focused tremendously on his ability to get girls to like him, and this is because it’s easy to impress guys. You see girls swarming around him, and suddenly, every guy want to be like him and be with him to know what his secret is and how he is able to attract girls instantaneously.
So there we have it, 10 awesome qualities to be likable!
Of course it’s also easy to get other guys jealous of you and your success with the ladies, but if you can woo girls, you can woo guys too!